Welcome to my Blog - What Is A Blog?

A blog is a personal diary. A daily pulpit. A collaborative space. ... Your blog is whatever you want it to be.

For many years I have kept a journal, which I don't write in as much as I once did. I have an inner yearning to communicate with the world through writing and pictures Part of my motivation is to leave something behind to a world that has given me so much - a mom, dad, brother, grandparents, a loving wife, high spirited and gifted sons, close friends and loyal customers. Most of us have had some help along the way to get where we are. In my 12 step program, step 12 is about giving back to others. I hope there are posts here that will warm your heart, make you smile and make you think. That is what my blog is all about. I hope you enjoy it. Ken

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Do You Think a Dog Can Grieve?

What do you think? I know what I thought and felt that day.

Sammi lost her big brother, Ozzie and although she didn't seem to notice he was gone, at first, it wasn't long before reality set in.

Sure, Sammi was a spoiled brat. She'd think nothing of growling, barking, and even attacking Ozzie if he got close to her bowl of food at feeding time. And she thought nothing of pushing him down the stairs just for fun!

But Ozzie was her big brother. Siblings do stuff like that. Usually, beneath all the fun and games lies love and affection.

It's a new road to travel for all of us now that Ozzie's gone. Do we get a puppy to keep Sammi happy? Shoot, if we got another dog now, I'll be in my sixties, maybe early seventies, by the end of its life - is that what I want?

For now, we'll just let things ride. Sammi's getting lots of extra love and affection. As we walk further down the road, I'm sure we'll get clear on what to do.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Kids & Traffic Lights by Ken Tuvman

They look darling, right? Well, you're right. They are darling. . . most of the time.
Being a teenager is sort of like a yellow traffic light - sometimes it's hard to know when to go and when to stop.
As parents to my two boys, I know I'm doing my job when they tell me how much they dislike the consequences I'll impose when I find their going the wrong way. Does it hurt when my kid says, "I can't stand you, Dad or I'll never be like you or mom!" Does it hurt when my kid says "just wait, when I'm 18 I'm moving out and joining the Army and You Can't Stop Me!"
Sure it hurts, but only for a little while. . . I get over it.
I promise you that G-d forbid, should something terrible occur because I'm asleep at the wheel on my watch as a parent, I'm going to really be hurting!!!
This past New Year's one of mine was grounded. He knows the rules, but thought he'd bend them anyway. Dad's busy, he'll never know.
So we got to spend New Year's Eve together - I was upstairs and he was downstairs, but we were both under the same roof and most importantly, he was safe on a potentially dangerous evening for most teenagers. (temptation, temptation, temptation).
Sure, we're busy: Annie and I have made it our business to be present as much of the time as possible; we decided to NOT raise our kids behind Blackberrys!
But as I said when I first started out, being a teenager is like a yellow traffic signal. Most of the time they have no problem going -- stopping, that's the problem. In real driving situations how many accidents occur when a driver decides he can make the yellow light that's just about to switch to red? And on the other side, is another driver ready to punch-it just as soon as "his" light turns green?
To my children, I'm Crosstown Traffic - when I see the signals have turned from Green to Red, my job is to slow them down.
Wow wee - helping navigate our children through adolescence can be very challenging. But seeing the alternative is also disturbing. I know too many young kids who never made safe passage through their teenage years. One, I know, got frustrated; she felt like she wasn't fitting in at school. So, her solution to her pain was to take her own life. Now that's a tragedy! I don't know of the words that can describe the shock and pain her parents are going through. That kind if pain just doesn't go away.
So, a couple quips of wisdom, to end my share today: 1) Structure is a parent's best friend. 2) Boredom is your child's worst enemy. 3) If you don't stand up for what you believe in, you'll fall down for anything!